I’ve long been fascinated with secret societies, so was ecstatically intrigued when I accidentally stumbled upon one of the most exclusive in the world, San Francisco’s Bohemian Club.

The Bohemian Club, founded in 1872, was originally formed by and for journalists who had been disappointed with the lack of arts and culture in post gold rush San Francisco. Shortly after it’s formation, they began to admit the wealthy and powerful, who quickly usurped the Club, ousting it’s original founders and taking complete control.* Control they’ve maintained for the last 137 years, boasting an exclusive membership including: George Bush, George W. Bush, Henry Kissinger, Colin Powell, Richard Nixon, Newt Gingrich, Dow Chemical Chairman Frank Popoff, Jack London, William F. Buckley, several Rockefellers, Steve Miller (yes that Steve Miller), Russian physicist Roald Sagdeev and CEOs and board members of influential corporations, (Bank of America’s board contains 7 members, Pacific Gas & Electric has 5 and AT&T 4)

read more…

* the ousted reporters went on to form their own club called “The Family” which is still in existence today.

In the Bohemian Club, “Bohemian” takes on a meaning unlike it’s typical association, and has been re-appropriated to stand for unity and toeing the party line. Amongst the club, being Un-Bohemian means to be disloyal, betraying their pact, and is the worst thing any member could be called.

The Bohemian Club has, and continues to be, one of the most exclusive “gentlemen’s clubs” * in the world. The club contains only 2700 members, (this number is significant for reasons that will make sense later), and as of 1999, had a waiting list of 20,000 “men of talent”, who will wait an average of 15-20 years. The vetting process is vigorous, beginning with three requirements: no reporters, no democrats, no women.

* the term “gentlemen’s club is used very literally. the club has never allowed women as members, and in the rare event that women are invited to the club for a social gathering, they must enter through the club’s back door, and be off of the grounds by dusk.

The Club’s secrecy is also legendary, in all of the press that has circulated, members have only complied when assured their identity will remain confidential. One of the Club’s rules,“No information regarding any Club activity or function shall be released by anyone to the media.” Ironic for an organization created by journalists.

However, the strangest of the Bohemian Club’s legend, is their annual retreat to Bohemian Grove, a 2700 acre encampment 75 miles north of San Francisco in Monte Rio. (The Bohemian Club retains only 2700 members at a time, to signify each acre of the Grove)

The retreat, a three week affair in July is a gaudy spectacle of power and theatrics. Bohemian Club members are allowed to invite guests, who’ve included: Tony Blair, every Republican president in the past 32 years, and writer Herb Gold.

The details of the festivities are vague at best, but as far as I can gather, two plays are performed, a “High-Jinks” play, which is always a tale of a powerful man, an extravagant epic with hundreds of cast members, and a “Low-Jinks” play, a musical comedy in which the female roles are played by men dressed in drag. Both are written exclusively for this annual event, neither are published or performed ever again.

Additionally, several political conferences are held at the Grove, and it’s often bragged that the Manhattan Project was conceived here. To what end this is brag-worthy is beyond me, but they surely seem proud of it. These discussions are referred to as “Lakeside Talks” and are held every day at 12:30pm.

From Richard Nixon’s memoirs:

“If I were to choose the speech that gave me the most pleasure and satisfaction in my political career, it would be my Lakeside Speech at the Bohemian Grove in July 1967. Because this speech traditionally was off the record it received no publicity at the time. But in many important ways it marked the first milestone on my road to the presidency…The setting is possibly the most dramatic and beautiful I have ever seen. A natural amphitheater has been built up around a platform on the shore of a small lake. Redwoods tower above the scene, and the weather in July is usually warm and clear. Herbert Hoover had always delivered the [last] Lakeside Speech [of the encampment], but he had died in 1964, and I was asked if I would deliver the 1967 speech in his honor. It was an emotional assignment for me and also an unparalleled opportunity to reach some of the most important and influential men, not just from California but from across the country. In the speech I pointed that that we live in a new world — ‘never in human history have more changes taken place in the world in one generation’ — and that this is a world of new leaders, of new people, of new ideas.”

Stranger still, and yes it gets stranger, is the culmination of the trip, a ritual-like ceremony, entitled “The Cremation of Care” where members gather around a forty foot tall owl, their mascot, which represents knowledge, designed by twice Bohemian Club president, sculptor Haig Patigian. Members, dressed in red robes, and pointed hats carry out a coffin containing the intimation of a human body that represents all the cares of the world. Accompanied by a live orchestra, the head “priest” reads from a script hundreds of years old as the coffin is lit afire. The ritual is said to merely be symbolic of letting things go so that they can enjoy their retreat, but if you ask me, a glass of champagne would do just as well.

Despite his insane ramblings, Alex Jones snuck into a Bohemian Grove retreat and captured video of the ceremony, which can be found around 1:20:00.

The annual event, with its prestigious guest list requires an large security staff, which has grown annually as to keep the events protesters at bay. The Bohemian Grove Action Network, prominently members of nearby communities, help organize protests and has assisted journalists with sneaking into the highly secretive event.

Not surprisingly, The Bohemian Club, and events at the Grove aren’t always held in the highest regards. In 2007 a speech being delivered by Bill Clinton was interrupted by a heckler who mentioned the Bohemian Club, Clinton’s response: “The Bohemian club! Did you say Bohemian club? That’s where all those rich Republicans go up and stand naked against redwood trees right? I’ve never been to the Bohemian club but you oughta go. It’d be good for you. You’d get some fresh air.” God I miss that guy

And in lieu of the high regard in which Nixon held his speech at the Lakeside Talks, he was later quoted as saying: “The Bohemian Grove, that I attend from time to time — the Easterners and the others come there — but it is the most faggy goddamn thing you could ever imagine, that San Francisco crowd that goes in there; it’s just terrible! I mean I won’t shake hands with anybody from San Francisco.” Tricky Dick always did have a way with words.

And Harry Shearer, of Spinal Tap fame, who has attended the Grove retreats, wrote and directed “Teddy Bears’ Picnic” a farce on the events that take place there, and the latest addition to my netflix queue.

hopefully, this is half as interesting to all of you as it is me, and if i happen to disappear around July, I’ve probably been burned in front of a gigantic owl in a forest somewhere.

-vs

bibliography/suggested reading/places i stole this information from:

“Who Rules America; Social Cohesion & the Bohemian Grove“, G. William Domhoff, U.C. Santa Cruz, April 2005

“Bohemian Tragedy”, Alex Shoumatoff, Vanity Fair, May 2009

Comments (6)